Train Boy Who Lived-Chp 20

CHAPTER 20: TRAIN BOY'S LOST CONFIDENCE

Hey, guys. You know, honestly speaking…I lost my confidence…

Twincest: Wha…What?
Wormtail: Excuse me?
Chinatown: Huh?
Ablaze: What’s wrong, Train Boy?
Know-It-All: Hmm?

I hesitate a little, trying to get my bearings before I continue.

I feel like…you know, I’m not the type of guy who can expect anything out of a relationship. Come to think of it, I don’t really feel like I’m suitable to be a loner or have a lover at all, but that’s just me…

Twincest: Hey, hey, hold up! You’ve gone this far now, what is it with this kind of depressing talk?!
Padfoot: Yeah! You were so hyped before!
Moony: Are you trying to run away, Train Boy?!
FrenchLady: You’re almost there, Train Boy! What’s wrong?
Chinatown: You’ve improved so much so far! You must believe in yourself!
RedHeadFreckles: Don’t be such a pussy, Train Boy!
Know-It-All: Yeah! At least put your foot down and make up your mind!

I don’t know…It’s just that I just got off the phone with Dragon Guy…He told me about his company trip and I found out that he speaks perfect foreign languages, has exotic friends, and living the easy life…Yet I was here all day, fixing up my room and selling off things that I never really wanted to part in the first place and that took me a lifetime to collect…We…We’re really living in 2 different worlds…Totally different lifestyles that don’t tally and never really come close to a match…(sigh) What a real big difference we both are…

Wormtail: OF COURSE YOU GUYS ARE DIFFERENT! IT’S ALMOST A NORMAL THING! HOW CAN YOU COMPARE YOURSELF WITH HIM?! IF YOU’RE GONNA WORRY ABOUT THAT AND GIVE UP ON THE FLY SO EASILY, YOU WON’T SCORE IT WITH DRAGON GUY, LET ALONE ANYONE ELSE!!!
HerbologyFreak: Ranting and capslock frenzy aside, Wormtail is right. You’re already gone as far as remodeling yourself into a handsome man with worthy qualities, so not only you need Dragon Guy, he needs you too.
PotionsMaster: W…ell, come to think of it, Dragon Guy sure has much more better qualities than you do, maybe that’s what got you so tripped up. LOL
Ablaze: Don’t go saying unnecessary things, you greasy git!
ParkinsonDisease: Yeah, you old bat!
Twincest: We’re trying to help him get his spirits back up here!
QuibblerGirl: Annoying!
Headmaster: A little harsh there, young man…
Moony: Believe us, Train Boy! There’s no problem!
Lil’Photog: Just bring out all your good stuff! You can do it!

Really, huh…? So you guys DO think that he’s got better qualities than me. Probably too good a quality. If we really got down to it seriously…can I satisfy him…? Or will he be outta my league…?

Twincest: Oi vey…
Padfoot: -_-‘”
QuibblerGirl: Oh, he’s got it bad…
GrumpyCaretaker: What’ll we do now…?
HerbologyFreak: How did it turn out this way…?
Chinatown: Oh dear…

It feels like a long time of quiet, helpless chat friends before I hear another entry into the chatroom.

Slugger: You disappoint me, Train Boy…

Wha…? Disappoint? What does he mean…?

S&D: That’s right, Train Boy. Dragon Guy might not be as perfect as you think. You might be disappointed and upset for being a Honeydukes geek boy, but he himself might be disappointed on things on himself that you might not know about.
Wormtail: Love is all about the effort, Train Boy! You must not give up; think about Dragon Guy! If you can’t do that, then go to hell! Die a thousand deaths, why don’t ya?
GrumpyCaretaker: You think the Dragon Guy you love only likes you for how you look?! Do you think he is a selfish, shallow dumb blonde?!
Padfoot: No~! My Dragon Guy would never be that way!
GentleGiant: Since when is Dragon Guy yours, Padfoot?
Know-It-All: Dragon Guy is only enjoying a company trip like anyone else would. With you, it’s a special kind of enjoyment!
RedHeadFreckles: I agree! Don’t feel down. I may be pessimistic before, but now I believe that even though you’ve walked your own separate ways to get here, everything will be fine once you carry on the journey together.
Moony: Moreover, so what if he can speak foreign languages? So what if he goes overseas often? So what if he’s an expert in tea? Compared to all that, going to Dragon Guy’s house is the true feat here! Because there is no airport in this world that can ever get you that sort of ticket! Foreign languages and traveling overseas are just a wallet and time away! No money is ever gonna buy you a chance to get even near Dragon Guy’s place if it weren’t for your own efforts!

Y…You guys…

W…Why? Why are you guys going all out like this? I wipe the tears of comfort off my eyes as I try to take in the fact that there are such things as nice people in this world.

After my parents’ death, I no longer believed in true sincerity and kindness, not after I was treated with such indifference and cruelty by the sorry excuse for a relative that raised me.

I never thought that I can find such people in the internet, and in a forum chatroom no less…

I will try my best, guys. I swear I will…

My phone buzzes, telling me there is a message. I pick it up and see that it is Dragon Guy sending me this message:

Forgot to tell you, I bought a loooooooooooooooot of souvenirs, so be sure to bring a bag along!

Dragon Guy…

Even when he went for his company trip, he still did not forget about me. He promised to buy souvenirs and he really did deliver.

Meaning he still thinks of me, that he still cares…

I promise! I promise I’ll bring along a huge bag to accept your gifts!

Thanks, guys! Thank you so much! I’m on top of the world now thanks to you guys!

Twincest: Phew~! Finally back to your usual self, eh?
QuibblerGirl: You got us worried there with your mood swings before the battle.
Lil’Photog: Don’t lose out, Train Boy!
GrumpyCaretaker: If you do this with all your heart, Dragon Guy will accept you with open arms!
Headmaster: Agreed, agreed.
FrenchLady: Hang in there, Train Boy! Trust us!
Wormtail: Can you feel it now? Can you feel the force with you, Train Boy?

Yeah~! The force is with me, all charged up and ready to rumble~!

Train Boy Who Lived-Chp 19

CHAPTER 19: JULY 30TH

I’m doing a bit spring-cleaning right now. I realize that since I’m going to be serious sooner or later with Dragon Guy, I have to straighten myself up a bit.

I tear off all the geeky posters of planets, computer and latest gadget ads, and also all the anime posters that have already way outlived its popularity. I gather all the comic books, magazines and novels that are accumulating dust, no longer read anymore and tie them into bundles. I take down all my action figures and toys that I no longer play or like and throw them all into plastic bags.

I know it might seem like a waste, but I’m not really going to throw them away. They are all going to a friend of mine who sells secondhand gizmos like these to geeks like me down at Honeydukes, so it’s not a total loss.

I mean, if I don’t get rid of this stuff and Dragon Guy decides to drop by and see these, I might just screw everything up, big time.

As I pack, I notice something and take it out.

Oh my god, it’s the limited edition of the Nimbus 2000 toy car model! I lined up a year ago in front of everyone else to get this, and on the wintery month of Christmas Eve! I almost broke my legs standing in line waiting for the store door to open and let us in to buy, and I almost didn’t get it because everyone was pushing past me and almost stampeded over me to get it.

Should I get rid of this?

Should I not?

……

Naw, lemme put this aside and think again whether or not to get rid of it.

Next up is the games. I am definitely getting rid of those that I’ve been playing for the gazillion-th time, and also all the hentai and yaoi games as well. Don’t want Dragon Guy to know that I’m a per…

Hey! That’s the sim game “Beauxbaton High” that I’ve been saving so much money to buy! I can’t believe it’s still here! Ah~! Playing this game was one of the best times of my life…

Hold up there, geek boy. Remember what you are supposed to do.

Must…Must get rid of it…Must…

My hand trembles at the thought of it.

Maybe…Maybe just for a little while. I’ll play it again for a little while before I throw it out.

Suddenly my phone rings. Who could it be calling me at this hour? I check the number ID.

D…Dragon Guy…?!

I answer the phone.

“H-H-H-Hello?” I’m stuttering as usual.

“Hey, Train Boy,” his beautiful voice rang in my ear. “Guess where I am? I’m at Kingscross Airport!”

“Kingscross, eh?” I realize the situation. “It’s that time already, huh? Do be careful now.”

“I will. I’ll bring back loads of souvenirs, so be prepared for me.”

“I look forward to it!”

I think I hear Muggle-born in the background and Dragon Guy replying before talking to me.

“I’ll call you once I get back on July 30th.”

“Alrighty. Bon voyage!”

“And one more thing…”

“Yes?” I wonder if he’s not pressing for time for his flight, though half of me wish our conversation wouldn’t end so fast.

“I…uh…”

“Yeah…?”

“I…I really look forward to meeting you soon, Train Boy.”

Wha…? Did he just say…?

“Gotta go. Boarding time. Bye.”

I barely acknowledge the hang up tone. All I can think of is those last words uttered by Dragon Guy.
I really look forward to meeting you soon, Train Boy.

That’s it! Goodbye, Nimbus 2000! Beauxbaton High, you’re outta here! This one? Don’t wanna! That one? Get lost! Don’t want everything! Do not want!

After clearing everything, my room suddenly looks so spacious now. Didn’t think I could do it, and didn’t think that my place could have so much room. Finally, my job is done.

Goodbye, geek world! You’ve got a new obsession now, and his name is Dragon Guy~!

--:--

“Are you sure that you wanna get rid of all these?”

“Yeah. Do gimme a good price for all these, please.”

I stand in the shop of my old friends Rachel Yearne that caters to the Honeydukes society when it comes to buying cheap secondhand geek stuff. She and her girlfriend Rebecca Levi are one of the rare breed of geek girls who enjoy the things we boys like, and they built this shop with their own savings. We knew each other way back when we were kids and I actually contributed a little bit to their capital for business. They’ve been more or less well-off ever since.

Yes, I know. I tend to have dykes for friends somehow, but that’s the story of my life.

“But wouldn’t they be of higher value if you kept them a little longer?” Rachel asks.

“It’s OK,” I say, although my heart feels like contradicting. “It’s not important anymore. I wanted to throw them away actually, but I couldn’t do it, so I decided to sell them to those who would really appreciate them, and I hope you girls might like it…”

I realize the girls are too busy ogling over the stuff to listen to me; but…Oh well, at least they’re happy. If they’re happy, then I’m glad.

I look up to see the girls looking at me in a sort of odd sense of silence, like they’re seeing me for the first time.

“What? What’s up, girls?”

“N…Nothing, really,” Rachel starts.

“It’s just that…somehow you look and feel…different now,” Rebecca replies. “What happened?”

Even they notice too, huh?

I guess it’s worth saying that all is not loss with the stuff gone from my life now.

Dragon Guy happened, that’s all that matters.

“Naw, I’m fine. Still the same ol’ me, girls. Don’t worry.”

--:--

Summer hols has finally passed. During that time, I keep going back and forth to Rachel and Rebecca’s shop bargaining prices and haggling to get a profit out of my stuff, and at the same time help them rearrange their stock with the addition of my items. I managed to earn a good profit and save half of them into my bank account my parents left for me when they were alive, but I am still left with some stuff that are deemed unsellable. Probably past its popularity prime, I suppose.

I decide to have them for keepsakes. After all, you’re only young once.

On the day, Dragon Guy is supposed to return, I receive a message from him, reading:

I’m home~! I just arrived at Kingscross Airport and I might be home about 9pm, so we’ll talk then!

I decide to give him time to settle down and unpack. At about 9:45pm, I dial his number and call him. He immediately picks up at the first ring. Now that’s fast!

“Hello, Train Boy~!”

“Ah ha ha,” I chuckle/ “So you’re back, huh?”

“Yup, I’m back,” he replies cheerfully. “Sorry, I wanted to call as soon as I get home, but I got some unpacking to do.”

“No big. So how was the company trip?”

“It’s so exciting! I dunno where to begin to tell you!”

“Slow down, slow down. Take it easy.”

“Well, first off we went to Malaysia. It’s my second time there, so we split up and explored the area…”

“Second time?” I am surprised. How often does he go on trips like these?

“Yup! And we stop by at this wonderful tea manufacturer…”

As I listen to his stories about delicious exotic food, foreign friends, sightseeing and native cultures, I realize that all I can do is listen and compliment briefly on the things. None of them really click with me, and I can barely understand some of the things he says to me about the lifestyle of the foreign countries he went to. He talks and talks elaborately until he barely realizes that all I can do in the end is give a “Oh”, “Mmhmm”, “Wow”, “Really?” and “Yeah”.

We are not in the same page somehow, but he is too excited to notice and I am too embarrassed to point it out.

The English teacups are put in display on the empty space where I threw out my Nimbus 2000. I stare at it while continuing to give mono-syllabus compliments to Dragon Guy’s story.

I never realize it until now.

We…are two different worlds.

Train Boy Who Lived-Chp 18

CHAPTER 18: THE BATTLE IS...

I pick up the phone and continue to sms Dragon Guy, chatting about nothing special in particular again. I guess there is no point for me to wallow in self-pity about spending the summer hols alone, if what is done for Dragon Guy is done. I’m just going to have to be patient about all this. The slightly sweet feeling returns again as we sms each other, talking about where he is going and what he will do there, aside from business and stuff. Before we know it, it is almost midnight.

I think it’s time we call it quits for now. Need to get up early for a meeting tomorrow to discuss about the company trip. Hear from ya tomorrow. Goodnight!

Yeah, goodnight, Dragon Guy. I lie down on the bed thinking about him and the day we had tea together at his home.

The familiar feeling has returned.

The feeling where my heart tells me it’s ready and that it’s time to say what’s on my mind, what I truly feel for my beloved Dragon Guy.

I embrace the feeling.

It’s about time.

Once we meet again, it should be about time.

Oh, which reminds me…

We’re done for now. How should I put this…Well, the next time we meet, the battle will begin. My heart tells me it is ready, I’m sure you guys know what I mean. All that is left is to meet again face to face and try to confirm this feeling towards him. Thank you, everyone, for your support so far.

Twincest: B-B-Battle?!
HerbologyFreak: About time!
Wormtail: Time? Time to confess to our Dragon Guy, innit?!
QuibblerGirl: When? When? When are you gonna profess your love to him?!
The next date will be the second week after the summer hols.
ParkinsonDisease: After the summer hols?! I can’t wait THATlong!!
Moony: I might be outstation at that time. Can’t you make it during the summer hols?

He’s off for a company trip on the summer hols. I could ask him to meet me the day after his company trip but…

Padfoot: But what? You’re not getting cold feet, are you? At least I’ll still be around during the summer hols…
Chinatown: Agh! I’m going back to my job after the summer hols!!

Like I said, I could ask him, but I know after the company trip he’d be a little tired out, so I want him to rest and not push things…

FrenchLady: Aww~! Isn’t that sweet? I wish I could get my husband to hear what you just said!
Lil’Photog: You must push for it! For us, man!!
RedheadFreckles: There is no rush on that. Just continue what’s left of your little bachelor life before you go forward with the love confession thing, coz once you’re really into the relationship, you’ll regret it…
Know-It-All: STFU!!
Padfoot: The next time you guys meet, there is no need for words. You guys would be staring into each other’s eyes and holding each other in warm embrace, and then…LOL!
Lil’Photog: I must say, this really is a miraculous moment for Train Boy…
Wormtail: No! It’s not a miracle! It’s the result of hard work and dedication on his part!!
Twincest: It’s a legend! The birth of an incredible legend! Legend that speaks of a brave man who triumphed over the biggest hurdle of a geek boy’s life…and his name is Train Boy!!
PotionsMaster: Well, I say if it weren’t for whoever it is that requested Train Boy to tell us about the brand of the English teacups and those who urged him to make the phone call, this miracle wouldn’t have gone this far…
ParkinsonDisease: Of course, don’t forget the drunkard geezer who started all this.
QuibblerGirl: In fact, if Train Boy had pretended not to see anything and didn’t do anything, we wouldn’t be here right now.
GrumpyCaretaker: A man with the greatest courage like Train Boy’s is someone that we hardly find these days in this country!

Aww…You guys…

Thanks so much, you guys. I never thought lives can be changed so much just through a measly ordinary-looking forum chatroom…

Twincest: You’re breaking my heart here, dear Train Boy.
Headmaster: The Lord works in mysterious ways, young man.
ParkinsonDisease: My sentiments exactly, Train Boy.
Lil’Photog: Don’t go crying on us now, Train Boy!
QuibblerGirl: LOL!
Wormtail: We can’t take all the credit, Train Boy! It’s not because of our power; it’s because of your own!
Know-It-All: Hang in there, dear ol’ Train Boy.
RedheadFreckles: Give it all you got…
Padfoot: Aww, Train Boy…
HerbologyFreak: Move it on up, Train Boy!
GrumpyCaretaker: Aww, shucks…
FrenchLady: (clap clap)

I really owe it all to you, guys…

--:--

I am at Hogsmeade again, checking out some clothes to see what would be nice to wear for our next date after the summer hols. I try a few, but none of them seem to suit me. After a few more tries and a few other stores, I finally find one in a place called Madam Malkin’s Boutique.

The price is a killer though, and I reluctantly replace it back onto the rack. If I were to buy that, I’ll probably have to survive on instant noodles for the summer hols before the next paycheck comes in. Oh well, no biggie. I guess Dragon Guy wouldn’t really notice if I buy a replica rip-off of that shirt that might cost much less and treat more kindly to my wallet.

As I walk out, a message comes in. I flip it open and see it is from Dragon Guy. I read the message.

I’m at the office right now. I’m not getting the family privilege of leaves now that the company trip is coming up. No rest even on the hols…(sigh) What are you doing, Train Boy? Relaxing with your feet up, I bet?

Such a cute message. I reply him quickly.

I’m doing a bit of shopping, actually. Not having my feet up, sorry to disappoint you, LOL!

Ah…Shopping with another guy, I suppose?

Naw, shopping all in my lonesome, unfortunately.

What did you buy then?

Haven’t bought anything. More like window-shopping and decide on some clothes.

You’re pretty into it.

Well, I gotta look my best the next time we meet.

Speaking of which, I’ll be back after the summer hols somewhere around July 30th, so how’s August 2nd sound?

OK, if it’s not too tiring for you. I wish you a safe flight, and do enjoy your trip!

No big. Wait for souvenirs I’m getting for you!

I don’t reply anymore because I am thinking about the date in which we agreed to meet.

August the 2nd, huh?

I can literally feel the wheels of my train of thought working as I pocket my phone.

August the 2nd…August the 2nd…

Ah! Fuck it! I gotta get that shirt!

So, despite the crazy cut-throat price, I tear the shirt off the rack and buy it on the spot. It hurts my wallet in more ways than one, but I know that in the long term, it’s worth it.

As I stare at the shopping bag containing my newly bought shirt, another message comes in. It’s Dragon Guy. I flip my phone open and see that it’s not an sms, but a picture message. I click on the link that is displayed on the screen and it reveals Dragon Guy’s smiling face and the short but sweet message that comes with it:

Can’t wait to meet ya!

I smile. Dragon Guy seems to always have creative ways of telling his feelings to me. I reciprocate with a picture of myself and adding the short message in it, saying:

So do I~!

I hope he likes my mugshot.

Train Boy Who Lived-Chp 17

CHAPTER 17: THAT SORT OF FEELING

Probably this figure is the reason why I can never get a boyfriend…That’s his message, so thus it is confirmed. He’s single.

Twincest: That’s…That’s…
Padfoot: That’s wonderful!!!
Wormtail: You’re not pulling our leg, right?
HerbologyFreak: Our Dragon Guy is single!
Lil’Photog: Wohoo~!!!
GrumpyCaretaker: A single, no-strings-attached man ready for the taking!
RedheadFreckles: Exchanging messages sure is rather blissful, isn’t it, Train Boy? One of the best times in courtship…
Know-It-All: Aha! He said “Can never get a boyfriend”, eh? I told you my sixth sense is never wrong! See, he’s giving you another chance! Can you feel it, Train Boy?
RedheadFreckles: Remember, Train Boy ol’ pal, this is the happy times. I’m telling you, regardless your partner is a woman or a gay guy, he will change…Trust me…
FrenchLady: Ignore him, Train Boy! Now it’s time for the grand showdown!
QuibblerGirl: Yeah. Be cool, Train Boy, be cool!
ParkinsonDisease: Ride on, Train Boy, ride on!

I know that, guys. I’ll go full frontal assault right now like you said. I’ll keep messaging him, and tell you guys any updates. Wait for me.

I pick up my phone and reread the message again, just to make sure my eyes are not playing tricks. I know, it’s so skeptic of me, but I have to be sure. After being assured I didn’t hallucinate this message to life, I press the reply button. I give my words a thought before I reply him back.

I think regardless if you’re fat or thin, you still look as good as you are. Don’t mind the others. They just got no taste. Lol! Unlike me, I know myself. I don’t look the look, I don’t act the act, I don’t talk the talk, I don’t even walk the walk. Ditto here too about me unable to get any boyfriend!

I heave a sigh of relief as soon as the message is sent. I know Dragon Guy is a fast replier, but waiting for his reply somehow feels like eternity for me all of a sudden. When my phone buzzes, I literally attack it and read the message.

I think you’re a nice guy. I get nice feelings when I’m with you.

Oh my God! Oh my God!

“OH MY GOD~!!!”

I think I probably woke half the neighbourhood with my scream, but I don’t care. He said I’m a nice guy! He gets nice feelings when he’s with me! This means so much to me~!!!

I get nice feelings when I’m with you too.

Please don’t let me have such feelings. Lol!

He sounds so cute when he says that, making me pound the bed with joy. Maybe I can change my tact by pretending to be ignorant.

Such feelings? What ‘such feelings’? I’m inexperienced, so you’ll have to elaborate on that! Lol!

I wait for his reply.

I wonder what he thinks when he reads my messages.

Does he find it humorous?

Does he laugh at the expressions and emoticons I make?

Does he grin at the cheesy lines I make?

Does he think it through like me before he replies?

Does his face screw up like me when he waits for my messages?

Does his heart pound like I do when my messages feels like forever to reach him?

How I wish I could see him now.

See his reactions on my messages face to face.

His message comes in. I read it.

Do you mean ‘that’ feeling? Don’t you think it’ll be better to say it face to face?

Face to face, huh? Is he trying to hint that he’s giving me another chance on giving it another shot that I missed when we had tea at his home that day? It could work. I mean, at least Salazar wouldn’t be there to kill the mood. But what about other factors? Like outside ones, for instance? Wouldn’t that…

It’s the outside we’re talking about. There is always a place where there are no distractions and no disturbances, nothing to kill the mood. When there’s a will, there is a way.

It’s worth giving a shot.

After all, like my chat friend said, Dragon Guy is throwing me a straight ball, a chance of a lifetime.

It’s about time I have the glove to catch it.

I reply him.

I guess…I do have…things to say to you face to face…

It feels like forever again before his reply comes in.

Then let’s set up another date.

Date! He calls it a date! My heart skips a beat reading this line.

Well, next week is the summer hols and my part-time college semester is already over, and our office is having a company trip for the high-ups, so we all get more or less a good long few weeks off. I’m free at that time.

Sorry, Train Boy~! We’re having a company trip during the summer hols too~!

Gah! I fall onto the floor wallowing in self-pity again.

Agh~! The mood is literally killed again now.

I can’t last all summer hols alone like this…!!

Train Boy Who Lived-Chp 16

CHAPTER 16: I SAID IT...
 
I come home today to find out my chat friends been exchanging stories while I was doing overtime and did some last minute shopping for a new shirt. They seem rather interesting.

Wormtail: I almost had the same experience Train Boy did today. There was a drunkard banging at the door for no particular reason demanding to be let in. Obviously he thought he was already home. He was yelling about him being the bread winner and accusing whoever he was scolding about being ungrateful and such. Of course, following Train Boy’s example, I approached him to stop his nonsensical mood. He approached me just like Train Boy’s situation did, scolding me of my balls and demanding my age, but instead of stirring trouble like Train Boy’s did, he laughed and clapped my back, saying that I was one in a million of all those apathetic people who just watched him pounding away at the door, praising my bravery. He just grabbed me, made me sit beside him and jabbered about his college scholarship graduate son who was the same age as I am and quit his banker job to be a cartoonist, and sobbed about his plight. No football man appeared to rescue me, no one went to call the train guard and there is no Dragon Guy or Dragon Lady anywhere nearby…(sobs) TT-TT
Twincest: Well, I suppose Train Boy’s experience is like the luck of the draw.
HerbologyFreak: I let a lady have my seat today in the sub, and yet when I tried to sit next to her on an empty seat, she harshly moved away from me, leaving a huge gap between us…(sobs)
Lil’Photog: Train Boy sure got it good. I envy you, Train Boy…
Twincest: Speaking of which, where is our ol’ pal Train Boy? He hasn’t shown up yet.
Wormtail: Busy sms-ing his darling Dragon Guy, no doubt! (grumble)
Ablaze: Since he’s always sms-ing that Dragon Guy all day, then they should be a couple already, what with them already holding hands!
PotionsMaster: We can’t say that for sure…
RedheadFreckles: Then again, I must say, right now at this level, he should be at the height of happiness…
Wormtail: Ah! A newbie! You sound like you’re an experienced lover! Please tell us more!
RedheadFreckles: Well, what my experience was with my lady was…well, before I professed my love, my heart is always racing up and down with worry, just like Train Boy. When we finally held hands we would be exchanging sweet glances and smiling tenderly to each other. Like Train Boy, I would feel a little restless wondering what the other party is thinking, or what she feels for me. A little annoying, but at the same time it felt just nice to let my imagination run wild and think of wishful thoughts and retain that lovey-dovey feeling. Although…this sort of blissful feeling won’t really last that long. As soon as they gotten used to you and entered your life, they’ll just take you for granted, farting in front of you, ignoring you even though you’re literally walking in front of her naked…(sigh)
Padfoot: I tried to follow Train Boy’s example today. I got a haircut and bought new clothes. I even bought myself a complete tea set and researched on the proper classy tea-drinking, which includes heating up the cups, putting two teaspoons of tea leaves, pouring hot water and letting it sit for 3-4 minutes, then sipping the tea and let the taste savour in my tongue. It’s really delicious! I have never tasted such classy tea in my entire life! But…it feels so empty…Playing the “Train Boy Game” alone feels so empty…Hurry up and get online, Train Boy~!

I’ll get online soon, just after I sms Dragon Guy about my new clothes and get changed in my home clothes. I’m not even halfway done unbuttoning my work clothes when Dragon Guy replies me. He must have nimble fingers and killer typing skills to be able to reply me so quickly. I read his message.

Getting ready for summer, I see? You must have bought a cool dress to suit your cool nature, didn’t you?

Cool? He calls me ‘cool’? Ah, that is like the highest compliment I can get! I reply him quickly.

Thanks for the compliment. I’d feel happier if I know I’m dressing up just for you.

No way. You flatter me. I always get upset when it comes to this season. Because as soon as summer comes in, those damn thin clothes do nothing to hide my figure…

Hide his figure? What is there to hide?

Don’t be ridiculous! You’re nice, lithe and slim! You don’t have to hide that figure!

No, no, you don’t understand. My friends and even my own parents say that I’m too thin, that it kills off any charisma I have, and that I’m thinner than 5 aneroxic girls put together. You know, stuff like that…

I don’t think he’s that thin. But how am I going to put in words to comfort him?

Before I can think of some witty words, he sends me another message again. I read it.

Probably this figure is the reason why I can never get a boyfriend…

I read and reread the message over and over again, making sure that I have not read it wrong or I am not imagining things. I even flip the phone close and take a breath before reading it again. It’s still there, clear as day.

I can never get a boyfriend…

I quickly go online and tell me friends the news.

It’s confirmed. He’s single.

Train Boy Who Lived-Chp 15

CHAPTER 15: TRAIN BOY GETTING COCKY

Hey, guys. Today I had a good day more or less. Managed to get a deal going with a client and finished some paperwork and reports on time. I saw, as I took the subway home today, a guy who looks almost exactly like the old me. Glasses, unkempt hair, Honeydukes geek style dressing, backpack and all…Come to think of it. It has been a month since that incident. If it weren’t for what happened a month ago, probably I’d still be like him. This feeling I’m having would probably be something that would never be, something that would never have crossed paths with me. I would never have found the courage I didn’t know I had to speak up for other people and I wouldn’t have met Dragon Guy to ask out for dates, and I would never have looked like the way I am now. I probably would never have lived the life only geek boys could dream of. That’s a thing of the past now. Now that Dragon Guy and I have been seeing each other, it feels like a dream, and maybe it’s just me, but compared to when we first met, Dragon Guy keeps getting cuter by the minute…

Twincest: Oh, you seem to be enjoying yourself over there, ain’t ya, lover boy? (growl)
Ablaze: If that’s the case, hurry up and confess your love, dammit!
Wormtail: Confess! Confess! Confess! I compel you!

I have been thinking about that all the time! I mean, since we’ve met, we’ve become very close…but if we actually got down to it seriously, what would happen? I mean, we both are totally different in general. But then I thought, if I were to keep it all in and don’t confess my love, what would happen? Are we just gonna be friends? Or if I still went ahead and confess, what if he rejects me? Wouldn’t that make us become even more apart? If that’s the case, we would never meet each other again, let alone continue to be friends! I mean, the worst part of having a failed confession and/or a rejection would probably be him high-tailing and leave me…

S&D: Even so, you’re still gotta be a man about it!
HerbologyFreak: Yeah! If you really love him, then you should carry on with the battle with full frontal assault!
PotionsMaster: How can you be so chicken shit about rejection and dump off this whole deal?!
Lil’Photog: Yeah, what are you? 5??
GentleGiant: Stop babbling all this mumbo-jumbo nonsense!
GrumpyCaretaker: Go and fucking confess already!!
Headmaster: Alright, alright, everyone, settle down. No need to get all worked up in a bunch!
Moony: He’s right. Train Boy will confess eventually.
FrenchLady: Yeah, guys. Don’t fret. The time will come soon enough.
QuibblerGirl: Ain’t that right, Train Boy?

Again, I feel like being referred to as a third person being debated like this. I answer a message from Dragon Guy requesting ideas on what sort of computer would allow him to shop online, have the basic internet necessities and support big wads of software, and fits the budget. Basically he’s asking me if he could find a cheap but high-end PC. That would prove a bit of a problem, but I’ll see what I can do.

As I reply him some of the models that might match what he wants including the specs of it, I see something in TV that catches my attention and reminds me of something, in which I type it into the chat space.

Hey, that actor promoting the Triwizard brand deodorant looks exactly like Dragon Guy!

Twincest: No…
Ablaze: Fucking…
PotionsMaster: Way!!
GrumpyCaretaker: You mean…
Wormtail: That actor…that has…
Padfoot: THE VEELA HERITAGE?!
Twincest: ARGH~!!! I can’t do this anymore~!! Not after knowing Dragon Guy is such a beautiful creature such as that Veela-descended actor~!!!
HerbologyFreak: Me too…I feel very green with envy right now…I hate you…

I prefer Dragon Guy though…

Moony: Argh~! Don’t say it anymore, Train Boy~!!
GentleGiant: Fine! Fine!
GrumpyCaretaker: We get the point already!
Lil’Photog: Shut it!
S&D: One more word and I’ll kick your ass!
Slugger: DRAGON GUY IS NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND YET, IS HE?

I feel like I’ve just been thrown at with the iciest cold water ever.

Wormtail: Well said! I dunno who you are, Slugger, but that was something well said!
Padfoot: Hey, Train Boy, remember your position as Dragon Guy’s hero! He might reject you, probably, but then again, he might be in a situation where he can’t reject you!
Lil’Photog: You said it! That’s some powerful stuff!

S…Sorry, guys…I’ve learnt the error of my ways…I’m being too cocky…

Another message comes in. I pick up the phone and read it.

Got lots of stuff that I find complicating, so lend me a hand, alright?

Ah, so cute of him to lean on me and beg for my help. Ha ha, I feel blissful all over again! So blissful, I barely register the incoming replies in the chatroom.

FrenchLady: Guys, guys. You’ve gotten this far with him, so cut him some slack a little.
QuibblerGirl: Yeah! If I could be there, I would go to the end with him and help him out all the way!
Know-It-All: Since this is Train Boy’s love life, we’ll just have to walk in his shoes.
HerbologyFreak: You girls are so considerate. If I had friends like you girls, life would be so much better… TT_TT
Wormtail: Alright…Let’s just put aside our grudge on him loving a Veela-like god…
Ablaze: Ditto here…
Twincest: Sorry, guys, making you all so worked up in the first place…
Headmaster: Well, everyone. Let’s just leave Train Boy to his own blissful devices.
HerbologyFreak: You guys are so sweet…
PotionsMaster: Looks like it’s gonna be a long and hard battle.
Lil’Photog: So let’s not waste time!
Moony: I guess I could hold out for him for a while…
GrumpyCaretaker: I suppose sooner or later, Train Boy will confess eventually…
GentleGiant: And that day will be the battle of a lifetime!

Train Boy Who Lived-Chp 14

CHAPTER 14: TELL ME...

“Dragon Guy, I…”

Dragon Guy’s loud scream cut off my words. Of all the doggone (pun intended) moments, Salazar had to jump at Dragon Guy and pull at his pants, almost revealing his briefs. As he yells at the mutt to stop making chew toy off his pants, I am grumbling to myself in the background cursing that damn dog.

“Get into your pen, now!”

Salazar whines as he is harshly escorted and locked into his pen. Dragon Guy gives him that annoyed pout I like to see sometimes before turning to me.

“Um, you were saying…?”

“Naw, never mind…” I reply, trying to suppress a grumpy tone as I sip my tea.

The mood is killed. There is no point trying to salvage it anyway.

We drink our tea in silence, occasionally making refills. I try to pick up the courage to speak what I wanted to say but it’s no use. My ready heart has already shrunken back into its cage of insecurity. All the stuff that I have thought about to prepare myself is all gone, and this awkward silence between us is not making it any better.

Now I know how it feels like when someone turns off the heat of the moment and the poor guy who’s all hyped up got his ‘little brother’ shrunken with loss.

Salazar howls, trying to get our attention and want out of his pen. Dragon Guy turns to glare at him, reminding him that he is being punished, and the mutt whines, looking away. Poor boy. He looks sorry enough. I guess it’s not really his fault. The mutt’s being himself after all. All dogs are playful by some nature. Can’t really blame him.

After all, I have him to thank for letting me see Dragon Guy’s briefs.

“Come on, Dragon Guy,” I plead for the mutt. “Cut him some slack. He didn’t mean it.”

Dragon Guy looks a little grudgingly at the dog.

“After all, I’d like to play with him for a little while. He seems lonely since we ignored him for tea.”

Finally, Dragon Guy smiles and lets Salazar out, much to the dog’s delight. We sit outside the porch on the backyard and while we continue having tea, I play fetch with the dog.

“Such a cute little dog,” I ruffle Salazar’s head and throw the ball again for him to fetch.

“He seems to warm up to you surprisingly well,” Dragon Guy comments. “You a dog person or something?”

“Not really. I dunno, I never got a pet. Never allowed to, so I guess Salazar knows that I need one.”
“Then lucky for you to be here.”

“So…” I watch Salazar running after the ball that is rolling away from him, “is this what you do every weekend at home?”

“Yeah,” Dragon Guy replies. “Nothing to do, just hanging out around here. And since it’s a family business, I sometimes get the privilege of hanging out at home more than at work.”

“Almost like me, except the family business privilege part.”

“You got a computer, right, Train Boy? Is it good stuff?”

“You don’t have one? That’s surprising.”

“Dear ol’ Daddykins doesn’t allow me to have computers,” Dragon Guy rolls his eyes and groan. “I never had a computer in my life. He says it would ruin my perfect handwriting and make my brain lazy. He only just recently lifted the ban and allowed me to have one after I managed to help him pull off a deal he couldn’t get, and that is after I badgered and blackmailed him to do so. I heard you can do shopping using the computer.”

“Yeah, online shopping. You never tried to use the computer somewhere else? Like at Muggle-born’s home or stuff like that?”

“I have. All the basic know-how of computing is in my head, but I just don’t have the real deal. Every time I need to do an assignment or do research back then I always had to depend on either the school or on Muggle-born, and now at work, because I need the computer, I’m always a little bit overtime than everyone else, which pretty much makes me more outside and less at home, thus the food-hunting.”

“Guess everything has its sources,” I grin.

“Now that I got the green light, I dunno what sort of brand or model I should get,” Dragon Guy laments.

“Wasn’t easy for me too, since there are so many new models nowadays.”

Salazar retrieves the ball. I throw it again for him to fetch.

“If you like…” I turn to him, “we can always shop for one together.”

“If it’s not too much trouble…” Dragon Guy turns to me expectantly.

“Not at all.”

Time flies by when you’re having fun. Before we know it, it is already 6:10pm. I quickly prepare to take my leave.

“Didn’t think it’ll be this late. Your parents might be coming home now.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Dragon Guy says as he looks at the clock with a faraway gaze.

“Wouldn’t be kinda…inconvenient for me to be here with you alone?”

“No worries. My parents know everything about you.”

W…Wait…Say what?

“They also know about how you rescued me and all those weekends together food-hunting. I told them everything. In fact, they have no objections over letting me inviting you here.”

“O…Okay…”

I feel like somewhere out of a stalker movie or something, or maybe even one of those scenes in ‘Meet the Parents’ where the guy gets awkward about people knowing everything about you, even your dirty little secrets.

“Anyway, I gotta get going,” I say as I give one last pet on Salazar’s head. “Thanks for the tea.”

“Don’t forget these.”

I take the box of teacups from Dragon Guy and made a sort of goofy grin, “Kinda weird preparing my own teacups for someone else’s tea.”

“No big,” Dragon Guy grins back in his own suave way. “So, you want me to walk you to the subway station?”

“Oh, no, no, you don’t have to. Thanks anyway.”

“But…”

“It’s alright. Besides, it’s dangerous walking back later alone after you send me off. I wouldn’t want anything happen to you.”

“Well…” Dragon Guy sighs, looking like he knew there’s nothing he could say to convince me otherwise. “Well, gimme an sms once you reach home.”

“Sure, I’ll do that first thing.”

We wave each other goodbye, and I thought I catch a little hint of that same sadness again he gave me when we were talking about the dog. Probably he’s just a little sad to see me go. After all, parting has always been our most hated moments when we’re together, just like we do when we had to part at Dragon Guy’s stop in the subway. I feel sad too.

More than sad, actually.

Like an emptiness.

An emptiness that couldn’t be filled no matter how I try.

And I know it’s because it’s my fault.

--:--

Hey, guys. I’m home. Everything was normal as it should be. We had tea and we talked and we played with his dog. Nothing happened.

I hesitate for about 3 seconds before I conclude.

That’s it.

Twincest: Wha…?
GentleGiant: Nothing happened?
Moony: You’re kidding, right?
Chinatown: Impossible~!!
S&D: No way…
QuibblerGirl: You idiot!
Know-It-All: You got no determination, you moron!
GrumpyCaretaker: WTF did you even go to his house for?!

I knew it. Everyone is totally pissed at me right now…

PotionsMaster: Okaaay…Drama much? Neways, you’ve gone this far, Train Boy. What is your hesitation anyways?
Ablaze: Ain’t it obvious, brother? He’s got no experience in confessions of love whatsoever!

You got that right, brother.

We’ve only met 5 times so far. I’m…just considering the right time for a love confession.

Know-It-All: Today WAS the right time! It’s a rare chance for you to have Dragon Guy actually inviting you to his home! What were you doing?!
Wormtail: All you had to do was say “I love you”, that’s it! C’mon, say it with me now, Train Boy!
ParkinsonDisease: You love that Dragon Guy, right?! If you do, then just bloody hell say it out to him! Tell him your feelings straight and true!
Lil’Photog: Don’t be shy, Train Boy! Confess it now!
Headmaster: Love is not just a battlefield, it’s war itself! And those who have no fighting spirit should just high-tail and leave right now!

I know that! I know that! I know all that! You think I don’t know?? But…But…

But most important is…I don’t have the courage itself to say “I love you”…You guys can try telling me how I am going to gather this sort of courage…

Because I’m gonna need it.