Mulan: A Parody-Chp4

CHAPTER 4 – INSIDE THE DREADED CAMP

As Sakuragi entered the camp, he was glad that his girlish look has earned the ignorance of the other girls. He was surprised to see the amount of people actually chosen to enter the war. Girls were abundant everywhere doing their own things like powdering their faces, testing out their weapons, combing their hair, reading a magazine and all sorts of girl things. But the ignorance didn’t stay for too long—his height that made him stand out among all the girls was beginning to draw attention.
“Woah there, girl. What have you been taking all these years? Steroids?”

Sakuragi turned around and saw that it was a threesome of girls with a Do-Re-Mi kind of hair, as in a short hair, a medium-length hair and a long hair. They were all looking at him with those bitchy eyes and seemed like they were ready to pick on him. He scowled.

“My height is none of your concern. Get lost!”

“Oh, tough girl, huh?” the medium-haired girl said with spunk. “Wanna pick a fight or something?”
“Don’t waste your breath, girlfriend,” the short-haired snorted. “With her kind of figure, she would be better off hanging around with the boys.”

“Yeah! She’s no fighting material!” the long-haired agreed. “Look at her. She may be tall but she doesn’t even have the bones to fight! She even carries a cat from home to this place! That is so lame!”

“Oh yeah?!” Sakuragi felt his blood boiling and his pride challenged. “You want a piece of me? Come and get it then!”

“Stop it, you girls! That’s no way to treat a new member in our group.”

Sakuragi spun round at the other voice which was behind him. It was also a threesome of girls with Do-Re-Mi hairstyles, but they look kinder and friendlier than the first threesome. The so-called leader, the one with long hair, came forward and stood between Sakuragi and the first threesome.
“Haven’t you have anything better to do than pick on the new members? You girls don’t fight as well as anyone anyway. We’re all new here and to train, not start fights.”

The threesome glared at the girl for a while before the short-haired huffed and said, “Come on, girlfriends. Let’s get out of here. No point wasting our time and energy over these puny characters!”
Soon they left, chattering among themselves which one of the girls in the camp was the weakest and the strongest. The long-haired girl who stood up for Sakuragi turned around and smiled, “Don’t let them get into you. They’re just a bunch of sore, uneducated bitches who nothing of the true meaning of war. I like your cat though.”

“A…Arigatogozaimas…” Sakuragi thanked the girl. “I’m new here and, uh, I…”

“Aren’t we all?” the long-haired girl smiled sweetly and held out her hand. “My name is Akagi Haroko, sister of the matchmaker Akagi Tawanori. You must have heard of him.”

“Nani?! The Gori?! You’re the Gori’s sister?!” Sakuragi was shocked at first, but realizing that acting like that would blow his cover, he shrank sheepishly, “Err…I mean…Sunimase, I was just overwhelmed that you’re the sister of the famous matchmaker…he he he~”

“Funny,” Haroko giggled. “There was someone I’ve heard about who would dare to call him the Gori. What was his name…Sakuragi Hanamichi…? Yeah, I think it’s him.”

Sakuragi was half-embarrassed-half-proud. Embarrassed because of the incident that made him fail the Gori’s test and proud because he has become the famous ‘tensai’ he claimed to be. He got back to his senses when he heard Haroko introducing her other friends to him.

“This is Fujii,” she said as she pointed to her short-haired friend, “and this is Yuki,” as she pointed to her other friend who tied her hair in to pony tails (I dunno her name in the manga, so I just made it up). Sakuragi shook hands with each of them. Haroko then turned to Sakuragi and asked, “What’s your name, friend?”

Before he could answer, he suddenly felt his hands which held Mido empty. He looked around frantically for him and saw that he was chasing a mouse. Mido may be a higher level kind of cat but he still has his animal instincts. Sakuragi gave chase, not bothering who he had bumped into just to get the bronze-eyed cat. It was like the out-of-the-coop chicken all over again. When he finally caught Mido and clutched him in his arms, he realized that he had just knocked down a line of people who were getting ready for their lunch, including the cook who was providing them with oatmeal.
Sakuragi and his newly found friends realized that he was in total deep shit.

Meanwhile, inside the captain’s tent, the general was discussing the strategies of war with a man with ebony-black hair and a pair of striking blue eyes. Beside the general was Hikoichi the Queen’s counselor. As the general continued to discuss the strategy, the man stared at the map she was pointing at in full concentration. His blue eyes looked serious and full of interest. Finally the general finished her discussion by handing a sword to the man.

“I hope that you will be able to train the girls and make them into lean, mean fighting machines by them time we send for backup, Captain Rukawa.”

The man who was called Rukawa looked at the sword with a mild surprise in his eyes. He took the sword tentatively and looked at it with admiration. Hikoichi, on the other hand, was in a state of disapproval.

“What’s this? We can’t have a man for a captain! Surely there must be someone else of greater experience to take this job! And a woman is needed, not a male!”

“He is suitable. I trust him,” the general replied. “Besides he had scored everything in the books and had mastered everything there is to know about the war. He was a special case in the team and was first in class and basic training. I can’t let him have desk jobs all his life if he’s meant to fight the war. Furthermore, he is of my ranking, not a commoner.”

Hikoichi nodded grudgingly as he recalled the rule. It is true that only women are allowed to go into war and men, even if they want to be part of the military team, are only allowed to be doing desk jobs and touch no weapons of the military. And it is also true that only the women in their families that have been promoted to higher rankings of the military such as generals, lieutenants and other high military ranks are allowed to have their sons to be part of the war as soldiers or other positions than doing desk jobs, which benefited Rukawa. Rukawa tied the sword onto his belt and stood up.

“I will not fail you, General.”

“Very good,” the general stood up too and left the camp. Hikoichi and Rukawa followed suite. They were quite shocked to see that the general’s assumption of future ‘lean, mean fighting machines’ were all on each other punching and kicking and fighting in a huge bundle, with a very tall redhead yelling and thrashing everyone who attempted to hit the lights out of her and a threesome of girls trying to coax her to stop. The general took it humorously and turned to Rukawa, “Well, you better get started if you want to whip them into shape. I expect a full report in 3 days’ time, Hikoichi.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Hikoichi said, then turned disapprovingly at Rukawa and stressed, “and I won’t leave out a single word.”

“Alright. I’ll see you then, Kaede. Sayonara!” the general said as she mounted her stallion and rode off, her troops following suite.

“Sayonara, Mom,” Rukawa Kaede whispered before turning to the fighting bundle of girls. Hikoichi gave him a smug look and raised his writing board. Rukawa got the cue and let out a shout, “Soldiers!!”

Everyone stopped and dispersed from the fight, pointing directly at Sakuragi and yelling, “She started it!!” Rukawa walked over towards Sakuragi who was still head-butting a woman, glaring at him coldly with his sky-blue eyes. Sakuragi realized the tense atmosphere around him and turned to look at those glaring blue eyes and ebony-black hair that shone under the sun. He let go of the woman and stood up straight. Everyone gasped to see that Sakuragi was actually a wee bit taller than their captain. Sakuragi glared back at Rukawa; he didn’t like the way he look at him and he definitely didn’t like that foxy look on his face.

“Who are you?” Sakuragi asked, to his new friends’ horror. “Don’t you know that a man is not supposed to be at war? You kitsune!”

“Mind your tongue, young lady!” Hikoichi said. “He is the general’s son and your captain and you…”

Needless to say, it resulted to a head-butt from the redhead.

“A captain, eh? Well, you look more like a kitsune than a captain to me!” Sakuragi said, folding his arms across his full breasts. Obviously, the breasts were new to him and it hurt a little to the touch. Mido hid behind Sakuragi’s armour.

“What’s your name, lady?” Rukawa asked coldly, his blue eyes piercing through, as if he could see the male look underneath the spell Sakuragi was cast.

Sakuragi wanted to answer but he couldn’t tell him his real name. That Hikoichi guy might have a record of his mother and her family members and he didn’t want to reveal himself and get decapitated for that. As if reading his master’s mind, Mido immediately whispered a name, “Haroko!”

“Her name is Haroko!” Sakuragi hissed, jerking his head at Haroko standing a few feet behind him.
“I asked for your name, not her name,” Rukawa said, his tone as cold as ever and his blue eyes even more piercing.

“Err…Oh, what the heck!” Mido was running out of ideas. “Just say that your name is…err…Minako! Yes, that’s it, Minako!”

“Minako! Yes, my name is Minako. Sakuragi Minako, daughter of Sakuragi Midori,” Sakuragi replied as he handed the report scroll to Rukawa. Rukawa took it and scanned it through. Hikoichi, who got back to his senses, looked into the scroll as well.

“No one said anything about Private Sakuragi Midori having a daughter in the family!” Hikoichi said in a suspicious tone, looking at Sakuragi Hanamichi—now Sakuragi Minako—from head to toe.

“Well, no one talks about me much, ‘coz I’m too precious to her and wasn’t allowed to go to war,” Sakuragi replied, getting into this lying business. “But then I told her that I’m a grown woman and I make my own decisions. And of course, I am tensai and I will prevail! Nya ha ha ha ha ha~!!”

Everyone stared at him like he was an alien or something (come to think of it, he does act like one). Hikoichi whispered to Rukawa, “I can see why they don’t talk about her much. She’s selling herself like a complete idiot!”

“Well, thanks to our Minako here, you’re all going to pick up every single crumb that is on the floor right now,” Rukawa said as he rolled up Sakuragi’s report scroll. “And I expect you all to be here early in the morning at dawn for your first training. You’re dismissed!”

All the girls glared and cracked their knuckles at Sakuragi with a vengeance, but shrank back when the ‘tensai’ glared back at them dangerously with his copper-brown eyes, his steel forehead glowed threateningly at them. Sakuragi turned back to the leaving Rukawa as he scooped up the spilt oatmeal and picked up the scattered bread, glaring at him grudgingly. His eyes were like on fire when he growled through clenched teeth, “Grrr~!!! Baka kitsune~!!”

“Please, Minako, don’t start another fight again,” Haroko came to Sakuragi and begged. “You’ll get us all expelled from camp. You can’t afford to go home now, can you? I know I can’t.”

The cleaning up ordeal lasted till late in the evening and needless to say, their dinner didn’t seem encouraging at all, what with the wasted food and all. Sakuragi’s hunger wasn’t satisfied with just two bowls of congee but he had to do with it. He could feel all the accusing eyes, except Haroko, Fujii and Yuki, on him like a spear through his back.

“Gee, Master Hanamichi,” Mido said as he followed Sakuragi into his tent which was isolated 3 feet away from the rest of the tents. “You seriously need to work on those social skills of yours.”

“Whatever,” Sakuragi groaned.

He predicted a hard day ahead of him.