“M-Miss Light…I was wondering…”
Miss Judith Light, my junior colleague, jump at my presence. I guess I can’t blame her, me showing suddenly in front of her like that. I need some help with the preparation for our date in the upcoming weekend and Light seems to be the only person I can count on. OK, she may be a dyke and is more of a lady’s lady, man’s lady, lady about town, judging by how I just heard her scoring a threesome date with two of our office’s ‘hotties’, as the straight men would put it, but she’s probably the only close friend in the office I’ve got. She, one of the few, knows my true sexual orientation and she has more gay boy friends than you can ever imagine, so I guess she qualifies as help.
“W…What is it?”
“You got a lot of gay boy friends, right?” I ask bluntly, knowing that’s how she likes to be addressed. “So usually where do they go to do their hair?”
“Well, they usually do it down at Hogsmeade,” Light replies. “I heard there’s a lot of ‘em fags go to this spot to do great hair.”
She puts things in a crude way, but she means no harm.
“Hogsmeade, eh? What’s the name of the place?”
Light gives me that look, like she knows I’m up to something.
“Oh ho, my little gay-bo senior. Are you telling me you’re going on…a date?”
I didn’t think she’d hit the jackpot.
“No, no, no! You’re mistaken!” I stutter, backing away into a vending machine. “Ouch! I mean seriously, there’s nothing going on! I mean, I’m just asking…I mean…”
“You are so naïve, gay-bo. I can read you like an open book without trying,” Light grins mischievously and hands me a card. “Here, one of my faggy friends go to this place, although you need to make an appointment first beforehand. Good luck on your date!”
My mouth may be in denial, but my heart is definitely in eternal gratitude over her right now.
So, as soon as I get home, I consult with my fellow chat friends for pointers for our dinner weekend.
Know-It-All: First thing’s first, based on my experience, you a) do not look around listlessly in an unfamiliar spot. That’s a big no-no; b) do not go asking yourself “What should I do?” coz it’s gonna make stuff really awkward; and c) do not say stuff like “I dunno what to say”.
This is good stuff. If no one tells me this, I wouldn’t know what to do.
Twincest: I think you should get started with your wardrobe. Honeydukes geek boy, right? If you’re wearing glasses, ditch ‘em. Get contacts. You gotta dress to impress to get some confidence to go in a restaurant.
QuibblerGirl: You should have straight cut body-fit jeans. Got ‘em? Wear ‘em. Put on a plain T-shirt and top it off with a simple denim jacket should do it.
Padfoot: Take it from a fellow gay friend. I think jeans go well with that Gryffindor brand T-shirt and jacket. Get a variety of Gryffindor designs just to be on the safe side.
What about what I should do on the day itself?
Moony: Here’s the checklist:-
Get plenty of rest the night before
Go to a salon
Fix your eyebrows
Pluck your nose-hair (LOL, seriously)
Clean out your ears
On the day itself, take a good bath, and wash your hair. You might get lucky, so wash “that area” as well
Bring breath mints
Bring tissue and hanky, just in case
Get your phone batteries fully charged
Remember the date spot’s address and number
Brush your teeth
Bring along enough cash
This guy is really helping me out. I better copy and print this stuff.
HerbologyFreak: Yo, Train Boy. I know you promised him you’d go Dutch, but I think you should just pretend to take a leak and scoot off to pay the bills. That way, you can have an excuse to ask him out again.
Padfoot: Wouldn’t that defeat the whole purpose?
PotionsMaster: I agree. Going Dutch is better.
Know-It-All: I dunno. I mean he gave him an expensive gift, so wouldn’t it be fair to return the favour by paying the bills?
You guys are really going all out for me…
Thanks, guys…
I’ll do my best. I promise I’ll do my very best…
--:--
“Welcome, sir,” the hairdresser approaches me, bringing me back to reality. “How would you like your hair done?”
“Um…” I take off my glasses, all-out ready for this. “Can you…you know, make me cool? Just gimme a haircut that’ll make me look cool.”
I can hear those looking at me sniggering. Bloody hell. What’s so funny about that?
“I understand, sir. Just leave it to me.”
“I’m all yours.”
Soon I hear him snipping away. It’s like he’s cutting non-stop, chopping off a lot of my hair. Is this really going to be alright? I hadn’t had a decent haircut in months, and I feel like I’m being given a haircut like I was Rip Van Bloody Winkle.
“All done, sir.”
I put on my glasses and stare at my new look. He really hacked off a lot. I look…well, I just look different.
“What do you think?”
“I…am…not too sure, really…”
“I think it’s you, sir,” the hairdresser says as he smoothes out some of my stray hair.
“R…Really…?”
Well, if he says so. What do I know about hairstyle anyway? I guess I should just trust him and take his word for it. I go to the cashier to pay the bill.
“How much is it?”
“That’ll be 55 pounds, sir, plus service charge.”
I nearly lost my marbles as I pay the bill. I leave the hair salon with a sense of detachment, like I left something rather precious behind.
“Thank you, sir. Do come again.”
I open my umbrella and walk across the street to the nearest bagel stand to munch on something to make me feel better. I never knew getting down and dress to impress would be so expensive. I wonder how much I might end up spending once I get a full-body make over. I get the chills just thinking about it, and it’s not because of the rain.
Oh, fuck it! Since I’ve already gone as far as getting a 55 pound haircut, there is no turning back now!
I enter a classy boutique shop where my chat friend Padfoot recommended me buying genuine Gryffindor brand outfits. It is very different from the secondhand Honeydukes clothes shops and hand-me-downs Honeydukes stands and I have no bloody idea where to get what I want. The salesgirl there is very helpful though. She patiently shows me around and helps me decide what variety of shirts and jeans suit me. I buy them in no time. A little heavy on the wallet, but that’s what you get for ditching rip-offs.
Wow! I feel like I’m playing one of those RPGs where the characters go to stores to equip themselves.
Then, based on my chat friend named PotionsMaster’s recommendation list of food haunts, I visit them one by one. I scan through their menus and play it safe by ordering their specialty, but all in all, they are pretty good and a little hard for me to decide. In the end, I made my final choice.
Now all I have to do is call.
“Hello?” Dragon Guy picks up at the 3rd ring.
“Hey, Dragon Guy, hi. Sorry I called you so late.”
“Hey, Train Boy, how’s it hanging?”
“I’m fine. Fit as a fiddle. Listen, about the dinner. I’m thinking next Saturday, maybe…?”
“Did you decide on a spot?”
“Yeah,” I keep my fingers crossed. “I was wondering…How’s about a good old-fashioned English dinner?”
“Oh, sure. I’d love that.”
“R…Really?”
“Oh yes,” Dragon Guy replies cheerfully. “I think English dinner kinda suits you a little. I dunno, it’s just something I feel about you.”
“Um, and also, uh, Dragon Guy…I…may look different than what you saw on me the last time. I might look a little…prepped up, so please don’t laugh at me once you see me…”
“Oh? Prepped up, you say?” he sounds surprised.
“W-ell, don’t get me wrong! I mean, it’s nothing much, so don’t get any high expectations, ha ha ha!”
Dragon Guy takes a while before saying, “Alright then, then I’ll get myself prepped up too.”
H…He would? For me?
“Well, I wouldn’t wanna impose…”
“Now you don’t go having any high expectations on me either, Train Boy,” Dragon Guy laughs humorously.
“Alright…So…See ya next Saturday. G…Goodnight.”
“Same here. Don’t let the bed bugs bite.”
I hang up the phone. My heart is suddenly overwhelmed with insecurity. I reach over to the PC, login to the chatroom and tell them our conversation beforehand.
That’s what happened. But…what will I do? It goes without saying that if I see him, I might fall in love with him all over again like the first time I saw him in the subway. He…He might have already a boyfriend…or like one of you guys said, he might not even be gay to begin with. He might already have a girlfriend for that matter. If I fall in love with him, it’ll only make the pain worse. I feel…sorta sad, really.
Twincest: Listen here, Train Boy. No matter what he is, gay or straight, or no matter how good or bad the ending might be, just remember: you are going to have the most wondrous time with that Dragon Guy, you hear me?
QuibblerGirl: I agree. Do your best, Train Boy!
HerbologyFreak: Amen to that, Train Boy!
Know-It-All: Regardless his orientation, I believe that Dragon Guy does not and will never hate you. This is my sixth sense talking.
I feel like crying again.
Thanks, you guys. After reading all you replies, I feel like there is nothing I can’t do. Confidence is all I’m getting now. I will clear up my messed up feelings and have the best date ever, no matter the outcome!
--:--
But before that…
Hey, guys. I’m going out now. I have gotten this far for a simple guy like me, all thanks to you guys. Your advice and encouragement has made me grown up so much now. Our friendship may have been a while, but it feels like we’ve known each other forever. So, guys, wait for my return and I shall disclose everything. Train Boy, over and out.
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